Can Never Trust You Again
by Neka0189
Summary: Carried on after 'You can't handle the truth'. Sam struggles to find who he really is but can't fight the overwhelming urge to succeed in capturing thirteen alphas for his big boss down in hell, even if it means putting Dean in danger.   brotherly love.
1. Chapter 1

[**First fanfic written. Please go easy on the newbie. Wrote this in a notepad. Filled it all. But I won't carry it on, unless people want me to. I won't bore you anymore if you think this sucks. I begun writing this just after the episode of 'You can't handle the truth' and the next episode trailer and carried it on from where I'd like it to have gone on to basically. Enjoy]**

Dean dragged Sam's limp body over to the wooden chair and strapped him down. The betrayal and the anger he felt towards him, still made his gut twist in denial.

"You lied to me. You tricked me. How the hell do you expect me to treat you any differently to this?" Dean growled, grabbing some rope off the counter and tying his brother's wrists behind his back. Sam groaned as the friction bit into his skin. He wasn't aware of anything yet, but the pain in his face. He was sure a sledgehammer has been smashed into him at full force. His mind was like a dark haze, lingering and drifting away like a morning fog, until he suddenly relived the closest memory of Dean looming over him like a rabid animal, striking him over and over again. His fist pulling back, only to slam back down and his other hand, clutching his collar to wield him into the brutal attacks. He groaned again.

"D-Dean? What.. What are you doing?"

"I'm keeping my head in the case, Sammy." Dean replied coolly.

"Case?"

"You're the case, Sam. Actually - scratch that. You're _my_ case."

Sam tested the wrist restraints and shot Dean, who was circling back round him, a hateful glare. The best he could muster in his battered state. "What are you talking about? I've already told you the truth. I told you the truth and you turned on me!"

"You told me you don't have any feelings. You can't feel remorse. You can't feel any fear. No guilt. And to me, that speaks nothing but a soulless- _monster_." He knew the harshness of the last word would burn him from the inside out. He watched as the overwhelming of pain flooded onto Sam's features.

"I'm not a monster. I'm Sam. Dean. You have to believe me. I told you for a reason - so you can help me find out what is wrong with me!" He winced as the wound on his lip split open again. "So maybe part of me got left behind in the cage somehow. I need you to want to help me. I want you to find the old me again. The Sam I once was."

Dean rubbed his eyes, tiredly. "This makes no sense. I called Cas down and he told me that you weren't Lucifer. You couldn't possibly be cus he couldn't feel it. Is he right?"

"Yeah."

"Or are you just saying that to please me?"

Sam sighed. "What do you want me to say? A lie? Yes, Dean. Lucifer is still inside me. That's why I've been acting so dysfunctional these last few weeks. Come on, man. If he was here, I'm pretty sure he'd of killed you by now. Untie me." He pleaded, giving a slight roll of his head to relieve the tightness in his neck.

"No." Dean said stubbornly. "Because even if you're not Lucifer. You aren't Sam either. And I can't take that risk of trusting you. And losing you all over again, in more ways than one."

"..I've lost something deep down. I haven't lost my mind. I'm not going to suddenly turn on you and ruin everything we've had!"

"YOU JUST HAVE, SAM!" Dean spat back with fury evident in his eyes. Sam didn't bite back. He grinded his teeth together in irritation and looked away. "..But even if there's just a speck of the real Sam left in there. You are still my brother. And I can't argue with that. So.." He lingered on whether to soften the tone. "-Come here and let me clean you up."

Sam turned back to look at him with an expression that only read; _How exactly?_

"I'm strapped down, remember?"

"Thanks for pointing that out, point dexter. I never would of guessed." Dean stepped round him and picked up a bucket of water he had prepared. He placed it at Sam's side and dragged the only other chair in front of him to seat himself. He then went on to rinse the cloth that had been floating in the water and pressed it against his brother's brow. He felt Sam wince from the stinging aid and grumble something under his breath.

"Sorry. What was that?"

"It's holy water. You're still testing me-"

"Yeah and shut up. It's for your own good.. How did you know it was holy water?"

"Cus I can smell it. It reeks. Mind reading aside though, Dean - that doesn't mean I'm a demon. See. My skin isn't burning." He rolled his eyes upwards to signal his bruised brow.

"Maybe we need to mix it up a notch." Dean smiled, reaching inside his pocket before Castiel intervened from out of thin air.

"Sam isn't to blame for this condition, Dean. Believe me, it's not his fault." The angel spoke calmly, less than an inch from his side. Dean flinched with unintentional dramatic effect and shielded himself instinctively. "Dammit Cas. Don't friggin do that again!" He blurted, catching his stalled breath.

Castiel looked nonchalant but averted his eyes guiltily. "Sorry, I'll try." He apologised. "..I'll cough next time." He coughed loudly into his ear, rendering Dean tense for a moment about the angel's sanity of normality. He looked at Sam, who looked back at him with the same old fashioned look.

"..Hello Cas." Dean mumbled.

"Dean. I need to exchange a secret with you in private."

"You're not going to confess your love for me, are you?" He teased. Castiel frowned,.

"No."

"Well then, it's as private as its going to get."

"Away from your brother."

Dean paused. "Is this about Sam?"

Castiel nodded slightly. Sam furrowed his brows together and Dean begun to lead the way to the small kitchen area in the next room. The angel followed, staring at the younger hunter with unease.

"He has no soul."

"What?"

"Your brother has no soul inside of his body."

"I heard you the first time but- How the hell has he lost it?"

"I believe becoming an ex-vessel of Lucifer can do that to you. Or render you dead. I'm not sure hoe he escaped the clutches of him or the cage but that is for when Sam wants to come clean. I suggest treading carefully around him. With no soul and bound to be pent up anger, he is going to be unstable. And having you right next to him when he's like that.. I don't think it's good for your health."

"Cas. He's my brother. He won't hurt me."

"Sam wouldn't agree with you on that." Castiel murmured. Nodding over to the door that held Sam behind it. Dean stared back at him hard and peered quickly round the side of the frame. Sam looked angered about something, but the swollen flesh covering his face, masked most of it.

"I can hear the two of you." He grumbled, just as Dean turned back to discuss further concerns with Castiel.

"Psst. Sam."

Sam froze, putting the voice to the face.

"Samuel? Is that you? What are you doing?

"Saving your ass from your brother - again. Keep quiet." And then he appeared from the hallway like a sweeping mist, briskly reaching for the restraints that held his grandson down. He could hear, as well as Sam, the conversation whispering next door. Sam rubbed his wrists and stood shakily to his feet. The room spun. He focused on the door Dean was just behind, deliberating whether to just follow Samuel's rescue or confront Dean without the weakness of being bound.

"I should really make him pay for what he's done to me."

"He will eventually. Just not now. Come on, we've gotta move." Samuel ordered, analysing the fact that Dean would glance into the room at any second and find them. Sam hesitated, sighed and then followed suite.

**TO BE CONTINUED.**


	2. Chapter 2

"What do you mean! He can't just disappear like that!" Dean growled, searching behind the doors and under the beds. He had left Sam only for a few minutes to discuss with Castiel on how to handle the delicate state of his condition. And now he had vanished into thin air, leaving nothing but rope and an empty chair.

"Look. I don't hold all the answers here. It's not in my job description!"

"Don't get funny with me, twinkle toes! Seriously, not the right time. Right now, I could hit something _really_ hard. Talking of which-" He grabbed the whiskey bottle sat on the bedside table and swigged a couple of deep gulps, registering Castiel's look of disproval from his side.

"What's that for?"

"Holding it in my system till I meet up with Sam.. and then I'll release to my head. It should make it easier to talk to the bitch."

"You don't reckon he had help escaping?"

"He wasn't escaping. Don't put it like that. He's just.. Broke free. He'll come back."

"If it makes you feel better, I'll agree with you on that." Castiel muttered. "Still escaped though." He added, under his breath.

There was a knock on the room door, in which both angel and human tensed and looked at each other. Castiel was first to move and flashed over to open the door, in less than a heartbeat. He could feel Sam on the other side and the aura surrounding him was difficult to read.

"Hey Cas." Sam acknowledged, smiling grimly at him from the doorstep. "I'm really sorry about this."

Before Castiel could react to the mild threat in the younger Winchester's voice, Samuel jumped in front of him with a pistol, already driving the tranquillising bullet towards his neck. The angel looked bewildered at the hunters standing in front of him, at how they could turn on him like that. The Winchester family. But it fell into a peaceful serene smile, as he slumped drunkenly into Samuel's waiting arms.

"NOO!" Dean hissed, lunging forward, having heard the shot and grabbing Castiel by the sleeve. He swung him back into the room and threw a punch at Samuel, dismissing the fact he was his grandfather, when he could kill a harmless angel. He was sent staggering backwards into his startled brother.

"Dean, wait! Let me explain!" Sam barked, wedging his boot into the gap between the door and frame where Dean was furiously trying to slam it. "Cut trying to bash my foot in!"

Death breathed out in frustration and snapped the door wide open again, facing Sam with arms spread wide, accusingly.

"I wish you'd just go back to hell!" He said with venom.

Sam felt small under the glare he was giving him but that comment slammed him way further down than any hell pit could go. It tore him apart to know Dean didn't care about him at all. Not anymore. Not now, because he was broken. He never wanted to grieve the fact that his brother might not accept him or help him but he could feel the impossible flood brimming his eyes.

"I mean why'd you have to pick on Cas? Hm? He was just trying to help you!"

"We haven't killed him. We need him."

"Is this going to be for one of your little experiments?"

"You wouldn't understand. And anyway, I didn't just come back for Cas. I came back for you."

Dean chuckled dryly. "You going to dope and bag me up too then?"

"Nope." Sam overwhelmed Dean with a powerful uppercut to his jaw, both unexpected with surprise and strength. "That'll do nicely."

"I thought we agreed on injections for both?" Samuel stood in the doorway, displaying the needle sticking out of the gun barrel ready.

"Nah. I kinda feel he deserved that one, with the way he messed with the face." He sniffed, wiping the blood from his knuckle. "Only fair. I'll carry Dean, you carry Castiel. I'll bag everything in the room where I know Dean hides stuff and meet you up at the van, okay?"

"You sure you don't want me to patch you back up?" He asked, pointing at the battered mound of flesh above his brow. Sam leant away, avoiding his touch.

"I'm fine. Really. We just need-" He felt exhausted but the need for sleep no longer mattered to him. He just wanted everything to have gone the way he wanted it to do in the first place. "-We need to move them to the hub as quickly as possible and lock 'em down."

"Even your brother?" Samuel sounded genuinely surprised. Sam looked at him like he was clinically slow at catching up with his way of thinking.

"Even my brother. He's human, is he not? And in the laws of the angels above, maybe the most alpha important one on the planet at the moment. He is part of the collection now."

"But you're gonna- He's not the fir-"

"I know! Sacrifices have to be made though."

They both stared at one another, trying to work the other one out. "If that's what it takes to make us whole again. But do you really want to have that soul without your brother beside you?"

"..I can survive. I'm not saying it won't be hard."

"Alright. If you're sure." He shrugged, moving past him and grabbing Castiel by the arm. He easily swung the angel over his shoulders and supported him, even at his age. Sam followed him with his eyes, watching as he left down the corridor before shifting into action.

"Dean. Come on, stop faking now. Get up." He urged, stepping over his brother to crouch beside him and give him a shake. Dean groaned heavily, clamping his jaw shut to stop the throbbing circling round his skull.

"G'tufme." He shook Sam's aid away and resulted to trying to raise himself off the floor. He wasn't impressed with the sudden emotional turrets Sam was having and he let it show when he faced him with glazed, unfocused eyes. "What the hell, Sam?"

"I told you, I'll explain everything in as simpler form as possible."

"I'm not a baby-"

"But you won't understand the dynamics and the rules of everything we've buried ourselves in-"

"Max detail! No distractions, now!" Dean demanded, wavering on the spot. Sam looked at him, concerned about the force of the impact he hit him with, but then the stinging pulse in his own brow reminded him, he deserved that one blow entirely.

"I'm not human, like that Veritos said.. I'm not human because I don't have a soul. And Cas is right, it's still down under somewhere. My entire being feels like it's being wrenched back there and it's only the sheer determination running through me that is keeping me here.. I fought Lucifer for you, Dean. I escaped hell to stop your pain. I clambered up them flesh ridden walls with a thousand demons on my back."

"And what if one of them is in you right now?"

"What?"

"What if the only reason you're still walking around, is if you are demon?"

"..Like I said. My skin didn't burn and you'd be dead by now. You have to trust me, Dean. Please." He begged, giving him the big eyed puppy look he always gave when he was desperate for something. Dean considered the facts and shook his head slowly.

"I'm sorry. I can't do that, Sammy. Not anymore-"

"Don't." He walked back in front of him. "My soul is gone. It's broken. Don't break the heart too.. You're my brother. You are all I have left to fight for. Without you, I-"

For a moment it looked like Dean might of changed his mind, but his eyes hardened again, against the softness of Sam's.

"I'm sorry." And slowly, he begun to walk past the being who had once been his brother; his best friend.

"I didn't want to have to do this, you know." Sam's voice purred in his ear, so close it made Dean shiver. Before he could turn to see how fast he had caught him up, he felt a splintering, screaming pain swim through his chest. His whole body shuddered as a burning fire electrified through him and spiked his brain. At first he thought he was having a heart attack, and he wanted to scream but it was then that everything was shunted, when his saw the bloodied fingers sticking through his chest. The sickness rose up his throat. His vision dimmed. And there was only blackness. No assumptions. Nothing.

"No. no, no, nononono." Sam could of screamed hateful words at himself for what he had just done. He had just felt the last beat of his brother's heart against his wrist. The warmth was savage against the iciness of his own arm. He didn't know who this other side of him was, it just appeared at all the wrong moments. He wanted to throttle his hand from his wrist. He wanted to break it off, but it stayed frozen within Dean. The only thing holding his body in the stance.

The room door swung open again.

**[TBC]**

**[TBC]**


	3. Chapter 3

**CHAPTER 3**

"Sam? What's taking so long?" Samuel burst through the door and fell back out of it at the awful sight in front of him. His first instinct was to shoot the one responsible for the death of his grandson but upon seeing it was none other than his youngest, he found it difficult to reach for the gun in his belt. "You.. You've killed your brother…"

Sam finally rolled his fingers back into a fist and pulled it out with a soft squealsh, catching him before he could fall. He stared open-mouthed at Dean resting in his arms and begun to fight against the sobs, that he knew would never fall. "No.. I couldn't have. I- I - It wasn't me. I never- Oh god. Get Cas back. NOW!" He screamed, falling to the floor with him and laying him across his lap. A heavy weight crunched inside his ribs and he knew instantly, it was the place where his soul was yearning to be back. That Sam was wildly aghast with tears and anger. He could feel it faintly, which meant it was stronger than anything should ever have to be. "Dean, I'm sorry. If you could of only seen it wasn't me!"

"Oh, I think he had an inkling it couldn't of been you, Sam."

Sam blinked away the invisible tears. "Crowley?" The name dripped from his lips like venom.

"By name. By nature. But I don't know what by nature that generally means. Although I can say under this.. Case, you're pretty much done for on this occasion. The choir boy you knocked out with that shot-" He clicked his tongue loudly. "-bad move. Luckily for you, I'm here to answer your prayers before Dean goes sour. Are you willing to make a deal with me, Sam?"

"You're behind me being like this, aren't you? Aren't you!" Sam accused.

Crowley pulled a face. "No."

"Then- You've launched a demon inside me or something."

"Sounds kinky but stop trying to make excuses. You did that act in front of you. No-one else did.."

Sam looked down at Dean and clutched his body tighter against him, away from Crowley.

"..I can bring him back for you."

"So can Castiel - without any consequences or deals."

"Yes, but time is of an issue here, Sammy boy."

"_It's_ Sam. I'll wait for Cas. Thanks."

Crowley grinned with irritation and sighed, taking his hand from his pocket and holding it out to both of them. Sam glowered at it with mild confusion. Didn't he know what no meant? He wasn't going to side with Crowley ever. Dean had drilled it into him many times before that demons did nothing more but lie and trick and torture. He had first hand experience on that too. "I didn't want to have to do this, you know." He said, mimicking what Sam had said to Dean only a few minutes ago. And yet his voice was much more deadly. Sam gulped and saw his hand start to twist, coaxing something.

Before he knew it, he looked down and saw his own hand in the firm grasp of Crowley's. No. Not his. Both of his hands were wrapped round Dean still. The hand led back to his brother, stretching forward from Sam to take the demon's shake.

"..Dean.." He wasn't sure how Dean had the life to move even an inch, let alone a gesture like that. But it was all summed up when the fevered black eyes eclipsed with his own. He choked on his own gasp, and flinched away from him, standing back up. "No! No! I didn't agree to that! I didn't shake- or kiss- or whatever- on this!"

"Oh. I have ways of making your soul downstairs agree to this. It's such a fragile thing. A soul. One penultimate attack and they disappear. Like a bubble. Or like one of them cartoons when they snap their fingers." Crowley smiled menacingly, snapping his fingers to cause Sam to flinch. He laughed. "Don't worry. I only took a small piece."

"A small piece? A small piece of what?" He couldn't believe any of this was happening.

"Your soul of course. What else? That's what you agreed on. A piece of your soul for the resurrection of Dean, your brother. It's a pity the soul lacks sense to dwell on the finer details of the trade of how to bring him back."

Dean begun to stand, absently ignoring Sam and focusing his full attention on Crowley. Like he was his god. It made him feel physically sick with how Dean had always told him how much he hated Crowley.

"I wouldn't agree to this! I would rather Dean _dead_ than to be a demon!"

"Even if said demon was one hundred percent Dean himself?"

_What?_ Sam thought. "You're lying. Dean hasn't been in hell. The angel's have got his soul."

"The angels have lost this battle. They don't really want Dean much now, since he is a unreliable and self destructing vessel of Michael. We captured him first- thanks to your handy work."

Sam shamefully hid the blood on his hands. "And worm holes. The time muddling worm holes. They threw him back a couple of centuries from the future when- guess what- you kill him again. You Winchester boys have some serious issues going on in those grapefruit brains of yours."

"Get it out of him!" Sam roared, keeping his eyes averted from the evil Dean standing at Crowley's side.

"I just told you it's your brother! It's really him. Now really, I have more important issues to attend to."

When Crowley vanished into thin air, both of them looked slightly miffed as to why he would just abandon them so fast. Even the demon in Dean looked uncomfortable which struck Sam with confusion. He blinked away from Sam and gritted his teeth, thinking hard about something to say. Anything to say, but like always, under a difficult situation nothing came to him. This was the brother he hadn't seen in almost two hundred years. Who had abandoned him. Lost hope in him. Damned him. And failed him.

"I have to admit it feels strange being in-" He begun.

"Don't say a word!" Sam spat, pointing an accusing finger at him. "You're not Dean!"

"And you're not Sam. That makes two of us."

"I'm more Sam than you are Dean though."

Dean frowned. "I think you'll find I've always been me, thank you very much. I've aged. I've held a few grudges. Busted up.. Way too many souls. And standing in my own past body it feels quite weird. But you've misplaced your soul?" He asked with a fiery edge. Sam tensed, looked at his eyes, black, and looked away with a stubborn nod. Dean burst into laughter and covered his mouth quickly. "Oh man. I thought they would of handed me your soul or something. You know, expecting me to struggle with the notion of doing it. I would of gladly done it. You see, in the future. I don't like you. At all. Maybe the time you're living in right now, I do but right now it is taking everything in me to stop from clawing your throat out and stamping on your head." Dean smiled wickedly at Sam's fast uneasiness.

He stalked closer, with one smooth movement, in less than a heartbeat, grabbing Sam by the wrist, hurling him round to face him. "Can you feel it? Can you? Lucifer stabbing, raking his claws, mutilating and biting your precious soul. He has to be so frustrated still about your rebellion. Any connection left between body and soul to feel that torture? To feel anything?" His grip tightened, causing Sam to crack his wrist from him like a whip.

"If you are who you say you are. That soul of mine down there, Dean. Is the _only_ reason you are up here right now."

"Who said I _wanted_ to be topside?"

"Don't give me that bull crap about you loving nothing more but bringing some of your pain onto your victims. You get tortured down there just as much as any other demon. Just because you're their bitch doesn't make you immune. I'm Sam. _I _can _feel _it, so a part of me is still here. And I know even with them black eyes skanking up your vision, there is still a small part of my brother left in there. My Dean."

Dean stared at him blankly and huffed. "If there was a small part of my human self in me- Which there isn't! - They would never in a million years trust me up here!"

"Christ almighty!" Samuel gasped, stepping back into the room with Castiel slumped against him. He gawped at the sight of Dean standing upright all on his own. But when the holy name was spoken, Dean spun round much too quickly and flashed his black swamped eyes at him with a dark scowl. He dropped the angel to the ground and fumbled with his holstered gun.

"Samuel, don't!" Sam warned, dashing in between his grandfather and brother. Dean hissed at his interference but still didn't attack him even with the distraction serving in his favour.

"He's a demon, Sam! Can't you see THAT!"

"It's Dean! It's all Dean! It's a complicated mess but its really him!" He stuttered, urging Samuel to loosen his grip on the gun.

"No." Castiel murmured form the floor. "It's not Dean."

**[TBC]**


	4. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER 4**

"What?" All three of the Winchester's gasped at the same time. Castiel begun to rise from the floor and tidy his crumpled suit with a quick snatch from the bottom of his shirt.

"It can't be Dean. The angels have Dean in the heavenly quarter. He's safe for me to replant him back in his body. That was until this obstacle."

"Hold on. You escaped when we drugged you?" Samuel questioned.

"Yes. What could I have done if I'd stayed?" He asked, theoretically posing the threat back at him. "I wasn't going to fight you. I just had more important-"

"He's lying to you!" Dean cut in. "He didn't save me!" His voice was broken with desperation, like he couldn't hold it back for a second longer. Castiel braved the distance separating them, staring hard and deep into the tinted windows of his tarnished soul.

"Don't pretend to know how much it pains me to see you like this, Dean. I know it hurts. And in your timeline before ours, my side might of lost the race to save you. But this time, now. We've found you." He spoke. Dean frowned, trying to make light of the situation. He saw no benefit in it for him. The blackness of his eyes lifted to reveal the emerald orbs, leaving him looking more human. "I can save you."

"You can save me? ..What if I don't want to be saved?"

"I can save you, so you can save your brother." Castiel rephrased. Sam gave him a look. "This is a pinnacle moment for both of you, wagering on your decision."

"I get it."

"It will only hurt for a few minutes-"

"Minutes are days down there!"

"What do you mean? Guys?" Sam couldn't quite catch up with what they were planning.

"He wants to exorcise me out of my body. Send me back to hell to make room for the rescued Dean. But what happens to me, huh? I'm just gonna seize to exist?" The panic in his voice was rising fast. He knew his own demise would have to come to restore the mistakes which had happened before.

"It will be better that way-"

"Cas." Sam said. "That's not helping the matter."

"You can't expect me to sit back and take this, can you! I mean- I'm the original Dean. I'm the first. You can't just obliterate me!"

"Sam. Don't listen to him. He's not the Dean you have grew up with. He's trying to manipulate you."

"You better shut the hell up, Castiel, before I do it for you _permanently_!" Dean hissed venomously at the angel. He was starting to annoy him with what appeared to be his constant siding against him. It also angered him to see him again after praying for him for centuries and receiving no reply. It proved he had been ignoring him and letting him suffer in hell. Castiel turned back to him once more, with sympathetic eyes, inches away.

"This isn't easy for you. I get that. But I am _not_ the Castiel that abandoned you. And for all my knowledge gathered so far, I believe Crowley sent you up here for a reason."

"To destroy Sam. To cause chaos and- and uncertainty between all you guys- Which has obviously gone to pot."

"No." They all looked at Castiel. "I believe Crowley sent you up here to _stop_ your torture. He knows what will happen and every event it can lead to. He knows we have the present Dean in our possession and that only one can carry on."

Sam looked across at Dean with concern. He looked scared, whilst he presumed no-one was looking at him. Maybe not to the rest, but he could read every crease on his brother's face. He almost pitied him. And yet he couldn't shake the feeling that he was damning Dean either way. Dean could feel him staring and glanced back, sliding the faint essence of fear from his face. He weren't going to look weak in front of the soulless guy.

"He sent me up here to be _killed_."

"He sent you up here to be _saved_."

"How the fucking hell is dying being saved!" Dean raged, allowing the black in his eyes to flare again. Sam flinched at the choice of curse. Castiel was right. This wasn't his Dean, not with a tongue like that. "I'm staying. There is no way you're gonna make me leave. This. This is my body." He planted his feet, ready to take on any resistance to his choice.

Castiel didn't hesitate at all with challenging the demon within. He ploughed into Dean with supernatural force, surprising everyone. Sam used his own jumping out of his skin to snap into action and secure his brother. Even through the struggle, he kept seeing Dean's eyes flash up at him with fury. "I knew I couldn't trust you! You soulless piece of- Gnargh!" Castiel grabbed his jaw and started to pour the bucket of holy water down his throat. Dean gagged and started to choke, smoke spluttering from his throat and filtering back down.

"Hold him still." The angel ordered Sam, fighting to concentrate on bringing the essence of the demon out. He placed his palm against Dean's forehead and allowed the exorcism process to puncture out through every pore in his body till the black smoke sunk back into the ground around them. The screaming lingering a few seconds after before silence took over.

Castiel finally breathed a sigh of relief and took the weight of his own body off Dean.

"Sam. I need you to wait with-" He looked for Samuel but it appeared the granddad had already retreated to the other room. "-Samuel in the other room." He read Sam's mind before he could ask why. "I'm going to bring Dean back down and it might be a little _unpleasant_ to watch your brother in such a way."

Sam nodded and quietly moved out of the room just as Castiel begun to roll up his sleeves and position Dean in the adequate position on the chair. A torn cry of unimaginable pain shook the walls, like it was plummeting to the ground. He barely shut the door when a gust of wind slammed the handle against his palm, clicking the door shut. "Everything okay?" He asked towards the door, unsure whether that was all it took.

"Everything's fine. I just needed to clear my head." Samuel muttered, coming out of hiding from the next room. He was busy wiping the sweat off his brow, which made Sam think he was up to something.

"Demons make you woozy?"

"Ay?"

"Never mind. We got Dean back. Or should I say Cas is bringing him back as we speak."

"And do you still want to follow the first plan?"

"Sure I do. What made you think I didn't?"

"Killing him. Caring for him even though you're soulless."

"I'm improvising."

"For what?" Samuel barked.

"Shh. For when Dean is locked up. It's going to be tough and he still needs his brother. I'm still going to be there for him."

"We already have ten alpha's in our possession. I'm not going to let you waste your time on just this one, if he doesn't even make the cut. And besides you don't really care for him."

"Yes, I do."

"You would sell him for a _dollar_, if you really needed a soda." It hurt Sam more when he thought upon that to disagree but then deep down, found himself believing he would do that for his own selfish need. He swallowed back his discomfort and reached behind his belt, producing the gun which held the single tranquilliser. "What about Castiel?"

"What about me?" Castiel chirped from the doorway, staring fixed at the gun pointed at him by Sam. He quickly hid it behind his back much too late.

"Nothing." Both of them said in synch. The gun had already been snatched from him and sat in Castiel's hands, laying their guilt out.

"Are you planning to use this on me or Dean? You only have one shot left, if you didn't know." He informed them, holding the gun back out to Sam who looked at it now with hesitation.

"You know I'll shoot you with it if you give me it back."

"I know that. Better me than your brother though."

"Don't worry, Sam. I got another for Dean." Samuel confirmed. He studied the speed in which Sam moved, snatched the weapon back and shot the stunned angel in the neck, judging it to be under two seconds. Castiel fell into Sam's arms, but was quickly passed over to Samuel like he was the hot potato. Dean would of heard that shot if he was already down.

"Same routine as before. But I'm not holding back now. I'll be right behind you with Dean."

Samuel doubted it would be so quick but played out with his grandson's orders. But upon Sam moving into the room again with Samuel's gun, he wasn't surprised to find Dean had disappeared. "Great." He sighed, lowering the gun with mild disappointment.

He felt the gun slip through his fingers and spun round to see Dean standing poised in the doorway. And then he lost him when stars burst into his vision, blinding him. Dean pulled his fist back and used Sam's temporary state of shock as an advantage. He tugged the gun again, wrenching it from Sam's grip with a grunt then aimed it at his brother, squeezing the trigger.

Sam avoided the tranquilliser bullet by ducking and ploughing his entire bodyweight into Dean, hauling his brother off his feet and onto the floor. The gun fell from his hold and slid across the floor, but both knew it was useless now. Sam regained balance first and kneed him in the face, before delivering a powerful blow to his cheek. Dean stumbled towards the chest of drawers, holding onto them for dear life. His body and soul were still acknowledging each other from the separation and it hurt more than usual when his body was demeaned by the battering. Sam came at him again, dragging him by his jacket and letting go when Dean twisted and brought him into a headlock. He tightened his arm muscle, growling to strengthen the attack. Sam fought to gasp for air, and elbowed him in the ribs. One, two, three times. Before resulting in diving forward to the ground, rolling Dean over his shoulders and into the drawers which had seconds before been his rest support.

He wanted to yell blue murder at his brother. Pounce back on him and strangle him of air. Kick him in the shin. Anything. But he thanked the lord, Sam was holding back his next attack, just so he could get his breath again. He was in an odd position, upside down, resting completely on the back of his shoulders until Sam moved to stand and he toppled back to sit on his knees.

"You _bastard_." Dean cursed shakily, wiping the blood off his lip. Sam panted but didn't lower his defence. He didn't trust Dean. And Dean didn't trust him.

"You can't beat me, Dean. Don't bother fighting me. But this would go so much more easily if you would just stop!"

"If I stop.. You're gonna kill me." He said, finally allowing Sam to see how much he distrusted him and how little he thought he was to him.

"I'm not going to _kill_ you. I _need_ you, yes. But I won't let any harm come to you.. Any real sever life-threatening harm come to you."

"What is this all about Sam? You better tell me now or I swear I'm going to-" No, he wouldn't. He knew he couldn't kill him. Not even now. "-Please. Just tell me the master plan here before I go insane."

**[TBC]**


	5. Chapter 5

**[Nearing the end of my notes and scrawled story, so from the second from next chapter its just going to be from the top of my head to the typing. Eek.]**

**CHAPTER 5**

"We're working for someone. They are keeping us alive to do this job for them."

"Do you know who or _what_ it is?"

"Crowley. I'm guessing. But I really don't know now. Maybe some mass demon.. They talk to Samuel and me through our dreams. Linked each time. He falls, I fall."

"I hope to god they're nightmare for you, not drugged up pixies or something."

Sam frowned strangely. "What? ..No. I'm in hell when I get the orders, Dean. I know I'm going down there because I _never_ dream if it aint that. I don't sleep because I don't _need_ it anymore. I'm a walking talking zombie Robocop. And it scares the shit out of me to know what I've become. But our- boss, keeps promising if we gather thirteen alpha souls in one place, he'll give us back our souls. I don't see any harm in killing a few bad-ass dwelling monsters, for the sake of two human's humanity."

"But Samuel has his soul?"

"No."

"Yes. Cas made a point of telling me just a few minutes ago, after he brought me back with a-" He wasn't aware of the throbbing pain swelling the end of his spine, but now that he thought about it, the bone hurt like hell. He prodded it and gritted his teeth. "-_Clunk_. It was the only thing he said, so I remember plain as day."

"Does Cas _lie_?"

"No."

"He's becoming more human."

Fair point, but he wasn't going to be rocked. He trusted Castiel with his life and soul now, a length more than he could with anyone else now. "Samuel has been **lying** to you, Sam!"

"You can't prove that! Stop it anyhow! You're trying to twist my mind, aren't you? I can tell you, it's not working. I trust Samuel more than I can ever trust you. He's smart. He's older. And wiser.. He's our grandfather! He wouldn't do anything to hurt us, Dean."

"You keep telling yourself that. But when those walls start to cave in and come crashing down around you and that sick, _vile_, gut-wrenching truth slips his tongue, don't expect me to be there to save your ass. Because I'm done. There's no point anymore. My brother is dead. And he's not coming back. You are nothing but an empty shell." Dean hissed back, ignoring the false emotion that wasn't Sam, slip onto the creature's features. He shoved past him carelessly, out of the door.

Maybe he hesitated at the front door for Sam to capture him, maybe he hesitated in the hope that by some magic Sam had become Sam again. He didn't know what method his brother had used but it had been enough to knock him straight out for a good hour or two. Or three..

It was enough time to strap him, wrists and ankles, to a metal chair in the middle of a dank dimly lit room, similar to how he had secured Sam earlier that day. This was payback, he thought angrily to himself. The moss clung to the walls, in between the darkened cell spaces between. The room was long.

"The cockroach awakes- about time." A voice droned from his right. Dean stared at the row of prison cells built into the wall and spotted who had spied his wakefulness. "Morning sunshine." The beast grinned toothlessly, its gums bleeding fresh with blood that splattered the floor. It rattled the bars, like an asylum loon, leading Dean to think he was being electrocuted for a second, before it let go and growled viciously. He stared at the cage on his left, and saw another strapped, chained and impaled on a chair too. The alpha of the fangs. The vampires. He looked serenely unfazed by his condition and simply nodded in greeting at the eldest Winchester.

"Where am I?" Dean grumbled to himself, wanting to nurse the hangover feeling storming through his head, but the metal strap kept him from it. "Cas? You in here?"

"I'm here." A broken voice called back in reply, further down the left hand side, at the Vampire's side. He could just see him, slumped in the middle of a circle of holy fire that was glowering from his own cage.

"Are you alright? Have they hurt you?" He asked, urgently fighting his own restraints in the hope that Sam had left them open accidentally. Of course not. "Was it Sam? Has he hurt you?"

"I'm not at liberty to say right now. I don't know.. But it hurts so bad."

"Wuss." Another alpha jived from further down his row. "Embrace your pain, for when I get out of this cage, I'm going to tear you apart and eat every last inch of you up, choirboy!"

"I'm guessing you're the zombie of these parts? Surely not the alpha. I mean, no-one can be as dumb as to piss off the nerd-angel, right?" He looked over at Castiel, who only gave him a weak grimace and curled in on himself.

"Its Croatoan, actually. Dumbshit."

"Zombie is easily to pronounce though." If he wanted an argument, he was going to get one. It was the only thing to take his mind of the wild ride where his life was leading.

"For gods sake! Secure his arms, Sam! Hold 'em! Argh! You trying to get me killed ,boy!" Samuel's voice splintered the alpha's response, kicking open the double doors at the end of the room with his foot and shoving something awkwardly inside. Another mysterious alpha. To Dean, it just looked like heavy potato sack dancing in mid air, but he guessed by the way Sam was wrestling behind, it was purely invisible to his eyes. He kicked himself mentally for still retaining the instinct to help his brother through the dire situation. Whatever it was, snarled wildly in irritation and bucked, flicking both hunters over it's shoulders, over Dean and into the furthest wall behind him. Dean fought to look over his shoulder.

"Sam?" He snapped, needing to know he was alright. _Such an idiot. Damn the old Sam for making me care about this one.._ He thought to himself.

"Dean! Stop moving! Don't draw attention to yourself!" Sam yelled, sounding like he was recovering himself from the impact.

"What the hell is it!" He yelled back, receiving the answer with a snort of air right in his face. The bag fell to the ground. The breath smelled of rotten flesh, and putrid acid. With a side order of wet dog. "Hellhound?"

It let out a throat curdling growl in confirmation to his prediction, that sent a terrifying chill right down his spine. He braced himself against the chair as far as he could, now becoming the asylum patient himself as his attempts to break free proved useless. His encounters with hellhounds before, they didn't end pretty. Not with one ending with his chest and ribs ripped open, thus sending him down to hell. He didn't want to experience that again. And he knew if it was the alpha of the hounds it also undoubtedly had a shared memory of his attack.

"About that pledge about not letting any harm come to me, Sam? Erm, I sort of wish you're gonna keep your word! Right now, would be a_ fabulous_ opportunity to do something! Sam!" His breath hitched in his throat as a deep scratch begun to run through the cemented floor. It was bathing in its moment.

"Have you seen the _size_ of that thing, Dean!" Sam shot back.

"You brought it home. You get rid of it! Never knew losing a soul, makes you a coward too?" He regretted insulting him at such a vulnerable moment and screamed through his teeth when a claw dragged through his thigh, causing a wide gash to spread across his flesh. "Gnaarhgh! Bitch!" He spat at the beast in front of him, needing to thrash about till he fell, cover the wound, scream till he choked. But he couldn't do any of those.

Instead, he just clamped his eyes shut and muttered over and over again; "_Just a flesh wound. Just a flesh wound. Just a flesh wound._" He felt the claw insert his muscle again, and it would of split him in two, he was sure of it, if Sam hadn't of raced by with a bucket of.. Blood?

The hellhound froze and jolted away.

His vision clouded dramatically, like the fog the Impala would sometimes drive into. But he couldn't sustain a suitable position, even the restraints were beginning to rattle loose with his constant fighting. The laughing and jeering from the alpha's around him made him feel physically sick. They were enjoying the show of the Winchester brother's struggling to keep control.

Sam threatened to drench it again as it slipped past him, into the cage with a sulky huff. He could hear Dean's stifled pain being echoed by sharp angry growls but didn't dare look yet to check on his state for fear of losing his own life, and what he hoped to be the thirteenth alpha.

"Right in there! Tail an' all! Alright, back off! I said back off!" Sam shouted, sliding the bucket inside with it as he pulled the barred door closed and cranked the lock across. The hound immediately begun to slurp up the serving of blood, making the contents look like it was disappearing into the air. Samuel rushed to take over, encouraging him to help Dean as quick as possible.

Dean was in bad shape when he suddenly appeared at his side, gripping his clenched fist in the brotherly clasp of his own hands.

"Dean, calm down, bro. I'm going to get this sorted, alright. Just hold on for a few minutes more. Everything is going to be fine. Oh geesh." He went to gag at the bloodied mess of flesh on his thigh, tangled with the material of his trouser leg but composed himself in an instant and begun to tear pieces of his own shirt to mop up the blood. The gash was too wide to be stitched back up. Sam could see that.

"Let me help him, Sam. You know I can heal him with a single touch." Castiel spoke from his cell, peeking through the flickering flames on the floor around him. "Break the circle."

"Gah! Sam, do it!" Dean grunted, losing focus again of his brother's face.

Sam didn't move, but looked troubled over this predicament, like it was the hardest decision of his life. He faced Castiel, looking like he was going to step forth to the rescue but then halted.

Dean wasn't sure past the blurred haze, but he could of sworn he had seen Sam shake his head.

His face darkened with indecision, snared only with a thoughtful frown, and then he turned his oversized back on the angel. _Ignorance is bliss. _And he only had to wait for the boss to come up and collect his load.

[**TBC?]**


	6. Chapter 6

**CHAPTER 6**

"If I let you out, Cas. You'll heal him alright. But then you'll flee just like that."

"No I won't." He interjected.

"I can't take that risk because right now, Samuel and me have completed our task which was set for us. We've captured a band of thirteen alphas. And we don't know what's gonna happen."

Dean looked at him with a mad look in his eyes. "So you're going to let me die! Cus, I really think you're gonna lose one if you're not careful. Now forget all the getting your own back crap and bring Cas right he- Ah, Christ!" He blinked back the burning tears that wanted to fall from the pain flaring through him, that mixed ugly with the betrayal and the pain spiking his mind.

"I'll save you, Dean. I promise. You mean something to me, I get that."

"You get that."

"-But I need you to hold on till after this all kicks off- Until I get my soul back. I'll patch you up best I can if anything. Can you try for me, please?" He took both of Dean's strapped hands and stared pleadingly back at him with big eyes.

"..I'll try my fricking best, okay? I'd much to prefer to piss on both you and the big boss's fire though and die, but I'm gonna try for Sam." He replied through calmed rage and a fully clenched jaw. "I hate you so much right now, you.. You- shell."

"I know."

"You don't even care if your brother _lives _or dies! Not in the brotherly sense but just for a job!"

"A soul is for caring and love, Dean. I don't really have any of that left in me. I can fake them to perfection but like this- I'll double cross you and not feel a thing."

"Okay. Just shuddup."

"I didn't want to put you in a cage though. Something deep, and I mean well deep, inside of me is still able to feel some sort of love for you, Dean. Because you're my brother and I would-"

Dean could see Sam was mocking his love for him and raised his lip into a sneer. He would of kicked him in the chin if his leg wasn't on fire.

"SAM!" Samuel called from behind Dean. He cut the youngest Winchester short and pointed to something behind him. "It's happening." All three of them looked in that direction, along with the rest of the alphas who could reach the bars of their cells.

A deep rattling begun to shake the entire room, casting a white light in the cracks of the furthest wall, like something wanted to break inwards. Dean took the moment to quickly analyse the terrified looks on both the hunters faces. Sam was stubbornly trying to compose himself, sweat brimming his brow as the noise grew stronger. He half-hoped at any second, Sam might reach down for his hand. His big brother's hand. But he didn't. When he looked at Samuel, standing next to him, he looked somewhat relieved that the superbowl moment had arrived. He was smiling. Was it just in the face of danger?

The light grew fiercer still, blinding before one by one from the nearest side, the light bulbs exploded. From then, all they relied on was the unnatural angered light that was now beginning to dim.

Sam heard Dean take in a shaky breath and snapped out of his scared trance, looking down at the apprehensive expression on his brothers face. He thought he was going to feed him to it but he was going to keep his word and protect him from needless pain.

"Dean. It's okay." He whispered down to him.

"What about this is okay, Sam?" He growled back.

"Be quiet!" Samuel intervened with a hushed voice.

The light was gone. Everyone was engulfed by the darkness until the emergency generator whirled into action and cast a red glow throughout the cellblock.

"Cas, are you picking up on any spider sense over there on anything?" Dean asked.

"Oh, the bitch is back." One of the alphas groaned through its bars, shrinking back against the far wall when a sprinkle of salt fell from the ledge above its bars.

Sam squinted, trying to see what the alpha could in the dark, but it was in vain. He went to pull his knife out to protect himself but Samuel touched his hand and shook his head, urging him not to.

"Hello boys." A voice purred right next to them. Everyone jumped in their skins as a slender built woman blinked into existence, draping her arms around Sam's shoulders and nuzzling his ear with her lips. Dean couldn't believe his brother wasn't even struggling against her but then his eyes fell to see her hand massaging a bright glow against underneath the fabric of his shirt. Sam's eyes bulged as the sensation racked his body. It was like bending his ribs with her every stroke. "You want this back. Don't you?"

"We brought you what you wanted. Souls. Thirteen alpha souls-"

"Hold it. What is Dean doing here? You've only got twelve, Sam. Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. That- isn't enough." The woman locked an intense stare at him, before turning her back on Dean who was now struggling to stop his head from lolling on his chest.

"Are you saying he isn't the most important being on this planet right now?"

"I am saying he isn't alpha of your.. Diseased race. He isn't the one who started your infestation. He isn't who you humans refer to as Adam. The very first creation and abortion. You're all flawed-"

"Can you stop dissing our race for one second. Please?"

"But Sam, why are you fighting their corner? You aren't either. You're not human anymore- never will be. Too damaged for that. You're not demon. Too high for that. Kill Dean now. Put him out of his misery of having no brother left. You'll be doing both of you a favour."

"I'm soulless, I know. But I still have a heart for him. I'm not going to kill him."

The woman pursed her lips. "You still love Dean?"

"..Yes."

"Which is why you're going to try and sell me his soul? Excuse me while I go and throw up at the cuteness of that. But I suppose I can take the next best thing of preying on all these other tasty souls you've gathered me. The more twisted and rung, the better." As she turned to start at the beginning of the cellblock, Sam went straight back to check on Dean's health.

"Dean? Hey, Don't pass by on this, okay? Fight." He tapped his cheek to try and bring him back to look at him. Dean stirred only the tiniest bit and used the faint energy to lean into Sam's palm and for a few minutes he could believe it was really the old Sam. The Sam he loved. And needed more than anything.

There was a disgruntled ripping scream from in front of him which made his eyes flutter to see past Sam. The werewolf dropped to the floor beside its bars, skin gripping round the protruding bones like it had been sucked dry. And the dregs of a smoky white light disappeared down the woman's obscene gaping mouth. She licked her lips clean and smiled back at them, before moving on, picking off the alphas one by one, taking her time and soaking up the fear pulsing through the room. Castiel looked scared now.

"Sam. I know you don't want to do this. Without a soul or with it. It is going to destroy you when you get it back if you don't find the courage to free me. That is going to weigh heavy on your soul if you provoke the death of an angel!" He shouted across to the youngest Winchester. "There are many other alphas out there eviler than my kind. Please."

Sam looked grimly back at him, seeing the woman was now only three cages away from Castiel. "She won't take you, Cas. You aren't an alpha either, are you?"

"No. Lucifer and Michael were the first to be recruited. But she won't stop to point that out to you. A soul is a soul to her. Which is why, when she brings your soul back- it is still going to hold a piece of the devil within it and she will want to drink it from you, Sam. She is going to slaughter you after she has used you as her soldier." Castiel warned in a hushed tone, scolding himself as he stepped too near the fire. "Dean is dead-"

"What?"

"-Nearly. You have to let me heal him if you still want your brother when you're fixed. And believe me, you'll need him."

Samuel shot daggers at the angel with his eyes, not wanting their hard work to be destroyed by mere last words. He was sure Sam would not fall prey to the plea and watched in horror as the pain cross faded onto his features, stiffening his jaw and setting upon his brow. He looked at Samuel, sensing his disapproval.

"I'm sorry, man. I can't- do this. I can't kill my brother. I can't survive without him. In any way. I can't sacrifice him like this."

"Sam." The woman was focused on him again. Five alphas down already. The rest whimpering. "I brought you back with no soul. How are you doing that?"

"No matter what you take out of e. No matter how hard you try and break me down there. You can't take away what family feel for each other. It's deeper than just a soul. For what I share with Dean with all these memories crammed in my head. The good ones. The bad ones. And the damn right suffering ones. He is the one person I have shared pretty much all of them with. And nothing- I repeat nothing can ever stop me from knowing how much pain I am making him suffer right now. To be by my side and still hold hope for me. You can't offer me any deal or bargain to jeopardise his life." He leant over Dean and unlocked his chained cuffs, leaning closer to his face and speaking through the corner of his lips. "-And I hope to god you had that confession." And with great care to his leg, shifted him into his arms.

Both the woman and Samuel looked pissed at his decision to rebel against the orders and glowered at him with frustration.

"You hold it right there, Sammy!" She snarled, pointing a finger at him dangerously. "Don't forget, a snap of my fingers and I can send you straight back into that cage. Dean stays in the party."

"Are you going to fix him or not?" Sam asked, pausing in his retreat to the angel's cell that felt miles away from where he stood. His voice sounded strained and tired.

"Why would I do that?"

"Then I'm taking my brother and going. This was all a big mistake. There is no way a termite like you could get anywhere near Lucifer and the cage. You'd be flooding your pants before you even breathed the air surrounding it. And grandpops."He turned to Samuel, who looked at him like he had just been scolded already. "I know your soul is intact. I'm not a fool. I would ask why, but.. No. I've never really given a rats ass about anything you've had to say in this past year. You're just a walking mistake. The real you is rotting under this ground as we speak."

"S'm." Dean choked into his sleeve, barely able to hear the snide comments his brother was making to the couple he knew Sam should never really piss off if he was to be put back together again. Sam nodded and walked over to Castiel who was still waiting patiently with a confused frown on his face.

He couldn't work out if Sam was lying about caring or not. None of it made sense to him.

[**I might leave it at that. Might. Because I have run out of notes from when I wrote this in the notepad and inspiration of some sort. Writers block. But I am open to writing another less depressing storyline in the near future for the boys. Just by using the top of my head and not written words. Thank you for reading anyway chaps and sticking with the story!]**


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